Archive for March, 2010

Mages Wanted: Ritual to free Stratos Needed!

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

Any capable expert on magery or other mystical arts is requested to help free the Elemental Titan Stratos from her stone prison. Those who believe their knowledge and skill is enough to solve this arcane puzzle should write down the steps of their ritual and submit them to Magnus Grey.

1. The writer must include all steps needed for the ritual. All ingredients needed should be mentioned. All words of power should be mentioned, as well as any explanations for those unfamiliar with magic.
2. The ritual should roughly be between 100 and 1000 words.
3. The ritual should be sent in no later than April 6th at midnight CST to
4. The greatest arcane researcher will have their name in the room of scholars along with his or her great work.


Squirrel Search, Sunday, April 4th, 3 p.m. CDT

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

Zox Greatsnapper cannot find her friend, Mr. Squirrel! She wants to invite him to her tea party with Ms. Bear and the Easter Bunny. He’s not in his nest and he’s not in his favorite tree. Where could he be?

Join the search for Squirrel Klickitat at the Counselors’ Hall on Sunday, April 4th, at 3 p.m. CDT. One of Zox’s friends will stay behind to direct latecomers.

The Peculiar Crimson Pie Dragon…

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

The Brit. Baker’s pet dragon has made a delivery to the Counselors’ Hall. Play with the dragon, and you may get a pastry.

Reminder on Pies

Saturday, March 27th, 2010

Mesanna’s Cream Pies are not rare. The EMs will sometimes hand them out after events. See you Tuesday for the Royal Spy mission.

—EM Malachi

(Felucca) Royal Britannian Guard, Sat. March 27th, 8 p.m. CDT

Sunday, March 21st, 2010

This event will take place in an undisclosed location in Felucca on Saturday, March 27th, at 8 p.m. CDT.

Each flesh-eating Mare of Jhelom will appear when enough bodies are on the ground to entice her to come nibble on them. If you do the most damage to a particular mare, you will find her (timered) heart in a box on her corpse. Bring this to Rosamund.

Gates will be available from these locations in Felucca:
a few steps southeast of the Britain moongate, 33°2’S 1°7’E
a few steps southeast of the Minoc moongate, 81°40’N 97°6’E
a few steps southeast of the Buc’s Den moongate, 53°47’S 97°44’E

At the Award Hall, the names of the four people who retrieved mares’ hearts will be inscribed on appropriate plaques.

Report from a scout:

Hercules has stolen the four Mares of Jhelom. I have spoken to a Feluccan veterinarian, Rosamund, who says the mares are vicious devourers of human flesh who should have been destroyed long ago. She is planning a ritual which will entice the mares into an area where the Royal Guard can slay them. However, it is too dangerous to perform in a populated place such as Jhelom. She also warns that it will require the spilling of human blood. As the good vet says, “your best bet to lure them in would be to slit your own wrist, or someone else’s throat. They like that.”

Keel’s note:

Suicide mission. Volunteer only.

More Info about the St. Patrick’s Event

Sunday, March 21st, 2010

On Friday, someone requested more info on Cuchulainn:


Cattle Raid

The Morrigan

A Yeats poem about Cuchulainn fighting the sea

There’s a lot more of course, look up the Ulster Cycle if you’re interested.

Also, I was asked if The Morrigan turned out to be good at the end of Friday’s event. No, she remains the goddess of war and battlefield death throughout. When the Royal Guard forces The Morrigan to leave Sosaria, she brings Cuchulainn’s spirit with her, to reincarnate it on the “green isle” she hopes to find. This isn’t an altruistic act. The Morrigan was very impressed that the lethally injured Cuchulainn tied himself to a wooden post so he would die standing up and could fight to the last. She assumes that when he’s not under Hercules’s influence, Cuchulainn will worship her and fight for her greater glory. As she leaves, she foretells that the next battle the Royal Guard will fight will be a bloodbath and says “I hope you all die wrapped in your own entrails.”

Royal Britannian Guard, Background For Friday

Thursday, March 18th, 2010

You’re walking near the Crane Marsh, idly tossing your all-purpose dagger, the one you’ve had as long as you can remember, from hand to hand. A horrible metallic clacking sound startles you and you drop your dagger in the water. Frightened birds fly low over your head, ruffling your hair. You kneel down and reach in to retrieve the dagger. As your hand closes around the handle you see the reflection of a face behind you. A face with a sharp metal beak. You stay perfectly still as it becomes three faces, then one again. You turn around quickly and briefly see the outline of a large bird, sunlight glinting off its sharp metallic feathers and heavy brass claws. Then it changes into a warrior in blood-red armor.

You stammer, “that sound…”

She shakes her head at your implied question and says, “I believe you call him Hercules.”

“Why is he making that awful racket?”

“He thinks he does a heroic thing by clearing the marsh of birds. We are particularly sensitive to loud noises.”

You nod.

She says, “I came to ask for your help to stop him. Now though I see…”

You stare at her; she seems to be blurring around the edges.

“…you shall defeat me four times, though I know not how.”

She has become a large eel.

You ask, “who are you?”

“A goddess of war,” the eel says, “and of death on the battlefield.”

The Morrigan disappears into the water.

In the Field of Echoes, Cuchulainn, hero of Homare-jima, finishes building a cairn to the ronins he’d defeated that day. He hears a footstep behind him and is instantly on his feet, his barbed spear in his hands, and his short body perfectly balanced for defense. He quickly sizes-up the large scruffy man in the red kilt and skull armor.

“I would know your name, laddie,” Cuchulainn says.

“Hercules, a great hero of Britannia!”

“Aye, then we shall compete to see which of us is the greater hero.”

Hercules opens his mouth for more bluster, but his self-preservation instinct stops him. Instead he slowly lays down his club and takes a flask out of his pocket.

“In Brit, we drink to each other’s health first.”

Cuchulainn says, “arra, I will honor your custom.” He sticks his spear points upwards in the ground and walks over to Hercules.

Hercules hands Cuchulainn a portable shot glass of whiskey, then pours some for himself into the large cap of the flask.



Royal Britannian Guard, Fri. March 19th, 8 p.m. CDT

Friday, March 12th, 2010

There will be a meeting of The Britannian Royal Guard on Friday, March 19th, 8 p.m. CDT, at the Brit. Counselors’ Hall. The theme will be Irish myths, in honor of St. Patrick’s Day.

Royal Britannian Guard, Scout Report, New

Thursday, March 11th, 2010

Report from a scout, morning:

In seeking information about the Mt. Sho Boar, I’ve learned of the Kentaurosu-Ronin.

These intelligent and physically-powerful creatures left Ilshenar many generations ago, drawn to Tokuno by its beautiful forests and fields. The Kentaurosu-Ronin are nomads who wander Tokuno with their drifts of pigs. They seek the finest grass for their carefully-bred swine, which are not only hand-fed, but also massaged daily.

They were last seen encamped near the Lotus Lakes.

Report from a scout, afternoon:

I was walking through the woods north of the Lotus Lakes when a centaur galloped past me, muttering about missing pigs. He was quickly out of shouting range, so I hurried after him. Eventually, I came upon a herd of Kentaurosu-Ronin packing up their camp.

One of the elders, Daichi, had a moment to speak with me. He said, “Several days ago, Hercules came to us, seeking the secret of pig taming. Of course we did not tell him, at first. We invited him to join us for our evening meal. He was not an ideal dining companion. He mocked us for eating our meat raw. To be polite, we offered to start a fire and cook the meat for our guest. Instead, Hercules gave us a strange gift, bottles of amber liquid. We did not wish to refuse this nascent show of kindness, so, as he was drinking it in great quantities himself, we sampled this new beverage.

As the night wore on, we somehow came to think of our guest as a brother, and thus shared with him the secret of taming and herding even the most recalcitrant swine. Hercules told us he planned to capture the legendary Mt. Sho Boar. At the time, and in our condition, this seemed a fine idea. When we awoke the next morning, our pigs were gone! We assume Hercules herded them away as practice. We have only just recovered sufficiently to be able to strike camp and search for them.”

I asked Daichi where I could find them again, but he shook his head and said, “we shall wander rootless until we locate our drift. We have spent many years with those pigs, and their parents, and their parents’ parents. We shall seek them until we find them or their bones.”

Royal Britannian Guard, Scout Report

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

Report from a scout:

I’ve done some preliminary investigations in Tokuno.

I went first to Makoto-jima. A woman in Zento said she had seen the Immortal Mt. Sho Boar run through her home. She’d felt very fortunate and had promptly hidden in a large vase until it went away. A man had then stomped in demanding paprika. She’d stayed hidden and heard him pillaging her liquor cabinet instead.

A fisher said he had been fishing in the Phoenix Mountains when he saw the lucky Mt. Sho Boar run past him, so he’d jumped in the water. A large man wearing skull kneepads dragged him out and demanded “dry thigh-me” for saving his life. At that point the fisher fainted. He was relieved to wake up and find that the man had apparently settled for stealing the sake from his lunch box.

A woman in the Northern Waste said she’d been hunting when she had the great honor to see the Mt. Sho Boar approaching. She had just killed a deathwatch beetle, so she crawled under its corpse. A man in a red kilt, she distinctly remembers that detail, lifted up the corpse and demanded she find him salt, pepper, onions, and garlic. She gave him the bottle of barbecue sauce she’d been planning to use on the beetle and told him he could find the rest of the ingredients on Homare-jima, as that was the farthest location she could think of at that moment.

Also, I found campsites which may have been Hercules’s

Makoto-jima, 51° 10’N 55° 53’W

Homare-jima, 85° 32′ N, 68° 20’W