Walrus Carols

Grandma Got Run over by a Walrus

Granny got run over by a walrus
Coming home from Vesper, Solstice Eve!
You can say there’s no such thing as vengeance
But as for me and Bucky, we believe
She’d been buying too much candy
Merchants begged her not to go
But she had dragons to take care of
So she recalled overloaded in the snow
When they found her a bit later
At the scene of the attack
She had tusk-wounds on her torso
And nefarious piglet tracks on her back.
Granny got run over by a walrus
Coming home from Vesper, Solstice Eve!
You can say there’s no such thing as vengeance
But as for me and Bucky, we believe

P.S. Granny will be fine, don’t worry 🙂

 

The Twelve Bloody Days of Walrus Festival

On the twelfth day of Walrus Fest Bucky gave to me:

Twelve murder mayhems!
Eleven bards a-screaming.
Ten war ships sinking.
Nine dragons dying.
Eight warriors bleeding.
Seven archers running.
Six mage a-crying.
Five great plans!
Four slow merchants.
Three fresh fish.
Two flying pigs,
And a bloody revenge fantasy

 

Deck the Walls

Deck the walls with lots of blood, Fa la la la la la la la!
‘Tis the season to be vengeful, Fa la la la la la la la!
Don we now our clever disguises, Fa la la la la la la la!
Troll our angry Walrus rantings, Fa la la la la la la la!

See the blazing town before us, Fa la la la la la la la!
Strike someone and join the mayhem, Fa la la la la la la la!
Follow me all about Vesper, Fa la la la la la la la!
While I rant of violent measures, Fa la la la la la la la!

Fast away our riot passes, Fa la la la la la la la!
Hail the new, yon piglet classes, Fa la la la la la la la!
Fight we a lot all together, Fa la la la la la la la!
Heedless of all consequences, Fa la la la la la la la!